Power of Play: Unlocking the Female Heart, Mind & Body
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By Francie Winslow
Why Movement, Joy & Nonlinear Living Matter for Your Intimacy
Somewhere along the way, many women lose something essential. We lose the lightness. We lose the play. We lose the part of ourselves that once moved freely and laughed easily.
Responsibilities pile up. Children arrive. Schedules fill. Stress accumulates. The mental load becomes relentless. And without even realizing it, we shift into survival mode.
We get things done and we manage all the things in our life.
But we stop playing. And when play disappears, something in our bodies begins to tighten.
“When we have stress and cortisol and a mile-long list of to-dos that we just keep plowing through with our mental energy, but we don’t incorporate any movement or play, we end up being very tense… and it doesn’t lend itself to very much pleasure.”
When we talk about the power of play, it’s about your good design, which includes your nervous system.
Play Is Not Frivolous
When we play, laugh, move, and explore without a goal, our nervous systems shift out of protection and into connection. And connection is the soil where intimacy grows.
Chronic stress communicates threat, while play communicates safety.
And a woman who feels safe in her body can soften.
A woman who softens can receive.
A woman who can receive can experience pleasure.
But it’s hard to be receptive when you are braced.
playful movement studied
One fascinating 16-week study followed menopausal women who participated in a jazz dance class. Researchers measured their sexual satisfaction, desire, and orgasm before and after the program.
After 16 weeks of playful movement?
All three metrics increased significantly — and even a year later, the improvements remained. What changed? Not their hormones.
Their movement, their embodiment and, their play.
Dance increased body appreciation, emotional well-being, sexual self-esteem, and arousal — while anxiety and stress decreased.
It’s hard to dance and stay tense at the same time.
The Feminine Need for Nonlinear Movement
Much of modern life trains us to be linear:
Goal-oriented. Efficient. Task-driven.
There is nothing wrong with structure. But women were not designed to live in straight lines all the time.
Femininity carries a nonlinear rhythm. Curved. Creative. Receptive. Expressive.
When we only operate in productivity mode, we suppress that part of ourselves.
Nonlinear movement — like free-form dance, swaying hips, rolling shoulders, moving without choreography — awakens something ancient and beautiful in the female body.
It doesn’t have to be elegant. It doesn’t have to look good. It doesn’t have to be for anyone else.
It just has to be free.
Playful movement reminds your body that you are not just a task-doer, but you are alive!
Small Resets That Matter
Playfulness doesn’t have to be dramatic.
It can look like:
Smiling intentionally and softening your eyes.
Noticing tension in your jaw and releasing it.
Turning on music and dancing for one song.
Shaking out your arms and legs.
Playing outside with your kids.
Hiking, stretching, bouncing, swaying.
Even a gentle smile activates your vagus nerve and communicates safety to your brain. That small shift can soften your entire internal atmosphere.
And that internal atmosphere matters deeply for intimacy.
Playfulness in Marriage
Many couples slowly drift into “logistics-only” conversations.
Kids.
Bills.
Appointments.
Schedules.
Necessary? Yes.
Connecting? Rarely.
Play must be intentional. Some practical ways to bring it back:
Put time limits on logistics conversations.
Dance in the kitchen.
Take walks together.
Try new workouts.
Play cards or board games.
Take a bath together.
Visit a hot tub.
Explore something new side by side.
Playfulness creates connection.
Connection regulates your nervous system.
Regulation increases receptivity.
Receptivity opens the door to intimacy.
This is not about forcing sex. It’s about cultivating joy in your body so intimacy can flow more naturally.
The Deeper Invitation
When Jesus says to come like a child, He is not inviting us into immaturity. He is inviting us into openness.
Children move easily between seriousness and delight. They are not constantly braced. As adult women, we must relearn this. Your feminine heart needs:
Permission to move.
Permission to laugh.
Permission to be nonlinear.
Permission to enjoy your body without performance.
Play can become a pathway to intimacy.
Go Deeper
Listen to this episode of Female by Design and, the door is always open to The Circle Group Mentorship where we learn to practice these principles.
If you feel tense. If you feel locked up. If you feel serious all the time.
This conversation will gently invite you back into freedom. Go listen to the full episode and begin unlocking your feminine heart through play.